You are a leader trying to improve your team’s performance. A CEO, or company owner trying to move their whole company to that ‘next level’. Or just an individual contributor trying to get past a plateau in your career. But it’s just not happening, and you are feeling stuck.
When you feel stuck, it can be very frustrating. You may feel like you are pounding your head against the wall, and you start questioning yourself. You rack your brain to come up with that idea that will finally help you move forward.
‘Stuck’ can come in multiple forms like, feeling burned out, feeling overwhelmed, feeling out of place and not following your values. ‘Stuck’ can be different for everyone.
When you can’t figure out how to move forward then you get down on yourself even more. It can go from frustrating to demoralizing. You may question your motivation, discipline and even intelligence.
Leaders have it even worse, because they aren’t just trying to move the needle for themselves, they are trying to make change-transformation happen for their team and/or company. That added pressure can turn up the second guessing and self-doubt.
But leaders need to give themselves a break. In today’s climate, trying to move to the next level is more challenging than ever. The world is so much more complex, especially in the business world. You are resilient but sometimes it can feel overwhelming trying to make things happen.
‘Stuck’ happens to all of us at one time or another. If you don’t feel stuck occasionally, you’re not trying to grow.
Why do People Feel ‘Stuck’ Sometimes?
When it comes to leaders feeling stuck it’s typically due to three things:
- Not knowing what to change
- Not knowing how to change
- Not wanting to do the work necessary to change
There’s a strong case to be made for adding one more: Not wanting to move out of your comfort zone even if you don’t like your present ‘zone’. This points to the old adage: “It’s the devil you know”.
Additionally, many times people’s lives are so hectic and so overwhelming that they live in a constant reactive, survival state. They know they want to get out of that mode, but they can’t possibly take the time to clear their head, calm their emotions and gain some clarity.
This is exponential for a leader trying to take their team to new heights in performance.
People too often equate feeling stuck in their lives and work, with not being smart enough and/or creative enough to figure out what to do. They think “why am I not good enough to rise to the level of others, achieve the things I want. I’m stuck because I can’t figure this out”.
That’s because they look at it solely as an intellectual and/or creative problem, which is only a fraction of the issue.
You know how people joke about counselors/therapists being notorious for saying “how does that make you feel?” Or when you ask them what you should do about something they say “well, what do you think?
Why do you think they ask that? No, it’s not because they don’t have real answers! It’s because they understand that many times people, have an idea of what they want or don’t want.
However, they get stuck in their perspective and emotions. This, in turn, affects their clarity, drive and motivation to act and make real, sustainable change happen.
Lastly, people can feel stuck because they have so many competing needs, desires and goals that they can’t possibly see the forest for the trees. They don’t know which to change or they try to change too many things at once.
How do You Get ‘Unstuck’ ?
How do you move the needle and finally propel yourself out of your current state?
- Find ways to quiet your mind, calm your emotions and think clearly:
- Meditate: Quieting your mind opens it up to think more clearly and calmly
- Exercise: Increasing your oxygen intake stimulates your thinking
- Find a quiet environment: Why do you think writers search out creative and inspiring environments to write?
- Use a different approach to getting unstuck, then you have previously used:
- Definition of Insanity: Doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results.
- If you want something to change…change your approach. Research how others have successfully moved past stuck. Don’t just keeping thinking you will figure it out. Ask for help by people who are experienced helping people and organizations change.
- Change your perspective so you can change your circumstances:
- Being stuck is a feeling and a mindset. It is not an absolute reality, and many times breeds negativity.
- View your present situation as part of your journey and the steppingstone to your next level of growth. It does not have to be your final destination.
- Drop some needs and prioritize the needs you have left:
- Many people feel stuck because they have so many competing and conflicting needs, desires and goals. It overwhelms them and paralyzes them.
- 1st…Drop some frivolous needs. 2nd…Prioritize changes that match your values to identify what you truly want to change.
- Don’t boil the ocean:
- Break up the larger change into smaller, more easily achievable chunks.
- This will give you successes under your belt that build confidence, motivation, and momentum.
- Action comes before motivation, not the other way around:
- One of the biggest mistakes people make is believing that coming up with some great solution will motivate them to act. Act first (even if a small action) and motivation & drive will increase
- Avoid ‘over analysis causes paralysis’. Get out of your head!
- Find someone to support you and/or guide you:
- They can keep you accountable, give you perspective and be a sounding board.
- They can help you figure out what you really want and/or need to change.
